This is has been a blog post waiting to happen for a while now. It has been a rant that has gone unranted. The subject of supermarket etiquette and the abuse of same is something that really sends me… off my trolley!!

When I get home from a long day at work , there is nothing more I enjoy than taking a trip to the local supermarket to browse the aisles aimlessly . I don’t really go there with a goal most of the time, I just find it a nice relaxing way to pass an hour

However, it seems that there are people out there who want to ruin my down time with a complete and utter disregard for other human beings when it comes to grocery shopping.There are several types of people one usually happens upon in the supermarket.

1. The Trolley Blocker : These little trolls, like to abandon their trolleys DIRECTLY in the middle of the aisle length ways, just in the exact position that would make it impossible to pass by. They then go on an  excursion to the other end of the market to pick up that pesky pint of milk that just escaped being featured on the shopping list. When in contact with these creatures it is important to keep calm and collected .Dont be afraid to move other people’s trolleys to make the way clear.
2. The Screaming Children Brigade : Every friday afternoon you will happen across a number of these. You will more than likely hear them before you seem them and that will be your signal to turn on your heels and go the opposite direction.When you are ducking in for a loaf of bread and need to be somewhere in a hurry is probably the most likely time you will encounter them. They are annoying but remember you were a child once too and more than likely had your fair share of tantrums. The tantrums usually stop fairly soon after bribery with sweets takes place.If you must approach the parents of one of these brigades PROCEED WITH CAUTION. I’d be stressed too if I had to put up with screaming  and kicking every time I needed a half-dozen eggs!
3. The Completely Oblivious Shopper That person, who stops. right there. in the middle of the aisle . for an unknown reason to the rest of the world. You will be pushing a full trolley behind them and trying to manoeuver your way through the hustle and bustle when all of a sudden they feel the sudden urge to take a quick breather and stand there  for an hour and a half just staring in to space.
4. The Small Change Counter  At the till, your almost at the finish line. You try to scour the counters to see which one has the smallest queue. You find one with just one person being served and you’re on the home run except when you get there , the person decides that they want to get rid of the jingling person and pays  a 32 euro bill with only coins. PUT YOUR COINS IN THOSE SMALL CHANGE BAGS AND GO TO THE BANK!!
5. The Financial Re-organizer Related to the Small Change Counter, is the Financial Re-organizer, the people who find the supermarket till an absolutely perfect place to have complete rehash of their finances, their purse , or their wallets. This person is one of the most infuriating people in the whole process . It is just not an appropriate place to become your own accountant!
6. The 50 Yard Dashers These are the people who wait till they have ALL of their shopping at the counter and are just about to pay when they realise -” oh no! I’ve forgotten my everyday staple – the caviar!.” .Then , as if the world is going to come to a complete stop , just for them, they leave all their products at the till while they go off scouring the aisles for this oh so important product.
7. The Trolley Congregation. Youre all done with your shopping expedition and are returning your trolley to the designated area like the stand up citizen you are , when all of a sudden , there is a huge obstacle in your way. Standing there, right in front of the row of trolleys , is the trolley congregation who feel like this is an ample place to discuss the latest events in their lives .

So there you have it, there are my seven most loathed characters who you will most likely meet on your next trip to the local supermarket. Just remember that most of these characters do not intentionally know they are breaking the rules of grocery shopping etiquette, so take a deep breath , go home , put the kettle on , and have a good rant about it like I just did!